The Milwaukee Brewers are baseball’s hottest team, rattling off a 14-game winning streak that has stunned the league and electrified their fanbase. It’s the kind of improbable run that would have had the late Bob Uecker filling every broadcast with a self-deprecating quip or one-liner about how nobody saw this coming — least of all him. Fans can only imagine what Ueck would have said behind the mic, perhaps downplaying the streak with his signature dry wit. But instead of jokes from the booth, the only voice we hear now is speculation: what would Milwaukee’s beloved broadcaster make of the Brewers finally playing their best baseball… just after he’s gone?
*** Now chatting in #UeckersHecklers ***
ChristianNotCatholic: boys we’re at 14 straight
FOURTEEN. the brewers are a buzzsaw rn
MisiImpossible: imagine what Uecker woulda said about this streak
“this is the first time we’ve been good since I was in diapers… which I might be again soon”
ChristianNotCatholic: nah nah he’d go
“don’t worry folks, I’ve seen this before. …actually no I haven’t”
*** spectral_bob has entered the chat ***
spectral_bob: oh that’s rich
NOW you clowns figure out how to win ballgames
after I’m gone
forty years of me cracking jokes while you lost 95 games a year
and you decide to become the ’84 Tigers the second I croak?
ChristianNotCatholic: uh oh he’s not happy
spectral_bob: all those years of me calling 100-loss teams
making jokes about bullpen pitchers who couldn’t find the plate with gps
AND NOW you clowns win 14 straight?
spectral_bob: you know what the worst part is?
people aren’t gonna remember me as the voice of the Brewers
not as the guy who made Miller Park sound like home
nope, I’m gonna be “the funny drunk guy from Major League”
forever Harry freakin Doyle, yelling “JUST a bit outside” in an Indians jersey
*** HEY GUYS THIS IS JI
*** JIM THOME has entered the chat ***
WORDUPTHOME: HEY GUYS THIS IS JI
JIM THOME
BOB, IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER
I GOT TRADED TO THE DODGERS ON MY BIRTHDAY ONCE
WORDUPTHOME: I THINK “JUST A BIT OUTSIDE” IS A GREAT LEGACY
BETTER THAN MY LEGACY OF STRIKING OUT AGAINST EVERYBODY
spectral_bob: thome i love ya but shut it
at least people remember you were good
I’m stuck as a GIF of the fictional announcer of a fictionalized Cleveland team that doesn’t even have the same name anymore
*** pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth has entered the chat ***
pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: uh hey mr uecker
if ur dead can u stil throw 40mph ceremonial first pitches??
asking for a friend
spectral_bob: farnsworth if i had a corporeal body i’d throw YOU in the sausage race
and you’d come in last behind the chorizo with shin splints
MisiImpossible: guys the ghost of bob uecker is actually MAD
this feels dangerous
spectral_bob: dangerous is calling 40 years of brewer baseball into a microphone without losing your mind
if you win the world series this year
i’m haunting the parade
*** spectral_bob has left to mutter “Juuuuust a bit outside” into eternity ***
*** WORDUPTHOME has left to google if ghosts can DH ***
*** pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth has left to apply for bratwurst costume security ***