Jorge Posada popped up on a podcast recently to declare modern baseball "unwatchable," blaming analytics, launch angle, strikeouts, and the disappearance of smallball. Never mind that today's hitters are trying to square up an endless parade of relievers throwing 99 with unhittable sweepers. Also quietly omitted from Posada's fond memories: the seemingly endless mound visits that helped turn mid-2000s Yankees games into four-hour endurance tests. Rob Manfred, whose life mission has been to eliminate exactly those sorts of delays, has some thoughts.

*** Now chatting in #BackInMyDay ***

CarnePosada: baseball's unwatchable now

too many strikeouts

too many home runs

launch angle

analytics

CarnePosada: nobody bunts anymore

nobody moves the runner

GreeneMachine: respectfully

everybody also throws 100 now

and the "slow" guy throws 97 with two wipeout sliders

CarnePosada: excuses

hit it where they're not

GreeneMachine: where they're not...

is usually nowhere

CarnePosada: hold on

this reminds me

/calls for time

*** CarnePosada walks to the mound ***

ColeTrain45: hey jorge

you're retired

CarnePosada: just checking in

ColeTrain45: about what

CarnePosada: vibes

*** two minutes later ***

CarnePosada: anyway

baseball used to be more exciting

Paws: ...

OldYankeeFan: jorge

i distinctly remember one Yankees-Red Sox game where my son graduated college between the fourth and fifth innings

CarnePosada: quality baseball takes time

OldYankeeFan: YOU WERE HALF THE TIME

*** PitchCom disconnects from inactivity ***

CarnePosada: now everybody just waits for home runs

GreeneMachine: because if you string together four singles against today's pitching

congratulations

you've solved quantum physics

CarnePosada: still

bunt once in a while

*** another pitching change ***

CarnePosada: excuse me

/instinctively starts walking to the mound again

BooneDoggled: where are you going

CarnePosada: force of habit

BooneDoggled: you're wearing jeans

CarnePosada: baseball is baseball

*** rob_manfred.exe has entered the chat ***

rob_manfred.exe: ALERT

PACE OF PLAY DETECTED

CarnePosada: rob

baseball was better before all these rules

rob_manfred.exe: counterpoint

i have archival footage

*** video loads ***

00:42 - Posada visits mound.

01:58 - Posada visits mound again.

03:17 - Posada and pitcher discuss dinner plans.

04:31 - Posada visits mound because the previous visit "didn't feel complete."

CarnePosada: context matters

rob_manfred.exe: context was "the Yankees were playing"

*** HEY GUYS THIS IS JI

*** JIM THOME has entered the chat ***

WORDUPTHOME: HEY GUYS THIS IS JI

JIM THOME

WORDUPTHOME: I LOVE SMALLBALL

I LOVE HOME RUNS

I LOVE A GOOD BUNT

WORDUPTHOME: BUT I ALSO REMEMBER

WAITING FOR JORGE TO FINISH TALKING TO THE PITCHER

SO I COULD TAKE MY NEXT AT-BAT

CarnePosada: those conversations were important

OneMoSave: one time

you walked out there

and asked if i watched a boxing match

CarnePosada: team chemistry

WORDUPTHOME: RECOMMENDATION

IF MODERN BASEBALL IS "UNWATCHABLE"

PLEASE DO NOT REINTRODUCE 2007 YANKEES MOUND CONFERENCES

CarnePosada: ...

maybe one conference

rob_manfred.exe: REQUEST DENIED

*** MLB_NewsBot has entered the chat ***

MLB_NewsBot: Jorge Posada criticizes modern baseball for analytics, launch angle, strikeouts, and lack of smallball.

Archived footage immediately reminds everyone why games often lasted four hours during his playing career.

Rob Manfred reportedly reached for the pitch clock after hearing the words "mound visit."

*** CarnePosada has left to tell kids about sacrifice bunts ***

*** rob_manfred.exe has left to install another timer somewhere ***

*** WORDUPTHOME has left believing every generation thinks they played baseball correctly ***